Ten Thousand Reasons...

There really is not a number of reasons I believe, because it is infinite.

  Every breath that I take, I give You thanks. Every bird, tree, flower and cloud I see, I give You thanks.  For every breath that my daughters take, I give You thanks.  For the immeasurable gifts I take for granted every day, I give You thanks. 

  Sometimes the blessings God gives me are so astounding I want to tell everyone.  Maybe to an unbeliever it wouldn’t seem like much, but for people like me, that KNOWS God is listening, the things He does has to be noted.  I’ve been saying to myself and intending on writing all these wonderful things, but I never seem to make the time to sit down and write. It is such good therapy to do this.  I’ve gone back to older blogs/journaling that I have done in the past and still think “Wow, God has been so good to me my whole life!” 

            I try hard these days to not worry about circumstances in my life.  I am intelligent enough and enlightened enough to know that worry gets me nowhere, well- it does, and it makes everything worse for the day of worry.  So, circumstances of a single mom are not always easy.  Money is tight, always has been, but God always seems to bring me through amazingly.  Not just a couple of times has He done this, but ALL the time.  The past couple of weeks have been one of those times.  Praying for God to make a way so that phones are able to stay on, water kept on, food on the table (or at least the fridge since I haven’t been cooking that much).  Praying and being assured that everything will be alright, it always is.  I read what Jesus tells me about worry -   Matthew 6:25-27 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?

            Worry makes me a different person.  A person I do not like, so I can just imagine how loveable I am to everyone else.   I am grouchy when I am worried and stressed and I take it out on the people I love the most, my girls.  Why is it so easy to lash out at our family when the problems we are having are within ourselves?  I need much help with that.  Thank goodness my girls are as forgiving as they are.  They know when I am stressed.

THANK GOD FOR WINN DIXIE

Today we are spending the day with family. We are having a cookout and I volunteered to make a dish.  But wait, how can I make a dish with an empty wallet, pantry and bank account?  It really isn’t usually this bad, but this week- it is.  Well, thank goodness Lauren borrowed money from me last week and paid me back last night. (Why do I feel so guilty taking money from my girls, even if it is owed?)  But thank goodness she did.  I got up early, went to daily Mass, gave all my worries to God and joyfully went on about my morning.  I went to Winn Dixie to get the ingredients for my dish and YAY!!!  Specials at Winn Dixie!  Thank God for Winn Dixie!  Currently we really are completely out of shampoo, laundry detergent, and deodorant down to shavings.  I walk in and there is those magical specials Winn Dixie has- buy these 2 items and get ALL this for free. Not only was there one special like this, but they had TWO!  All the things I needed to get by for a few more days.  Buy a shampoo and conditioner and get deodorant, toothpaste, soap and cotton balls free.  YAYYY !!!  I turn around and there is another stand of products with the big promo to buy laundry detergent and get fabric softener, fabric sheets, bleach and paper towels for free!  DOUBLE YAYY!!  Instantly I knew God had helped me.  I was able to get all the things we needed and the ingredients to make my dish and still have money left for the gas that is also needed for my car this week.  Yes, God provides.  He has provided again.  I owe Him big time again!

Matthew 11:28-30 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Luke 12:25 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.

ANSWERED PRAYER- GOD AND A JOB

                I have so many instances lately of God directing my life and providing for me beyond anything I could do on my own.  Even my job I have now.  I know it came from Him.  I do not know why he wanted me to have this particular job but I don’t question, I just move.  I move to where he moves me. 

                My previous job, which I loved so very much, was becoming more and more stressful as it was growing larger and larger.  The doctors had brought in a new office manager and things had changed.  I found myself not loving my job as I did previously.  Things were happening there that I was not comfortable with.  I can try to explain but it still couldn’t be understood what I was feeling inside about the changes going on.  Like I always do when I’m worried and stressed, I gave all the worry about my job to God and trusted he would take care of me.  In brief, one day office manager embarrassed me above and beyond anything remotely professional in front of my co-workers and patients.  Without saying what it was, just know that it was wrong.  I stood there after this embarrassing exchange with my mouth dropped open in shock.  My co-workers were dumbfounded and patients who witnessed it also.  I felt a wind-like push in my veins at that very moment and knew it was time to go.  I had never ever walked out of a job before, but I did on that day.  I felt an overwhelming sense of peace that I was doing the right thing.  Off I went.  Then the shock of what I did had just set in- Uh oh!  What did I just do?  I don’t have a job, I don’t have insurance, I don’t have 401-K, I don’t have 50 percent off products!  I have a family, a mortgage, a car, blah blah blah… and NO INCOME now.  Tears set in, then worry, then anger.  What is so strange is all those feelings didn’t last long at all.  I started praying and there came that overwhelming sense of peace that I had been so much experiencing recently.  I felt God whisper in my ear- “It is all going to be okay. It is all going to be better.  I have better things in store for you.”  I really heard this, and I really trusted this.  I spent the next few days being mom.   I got a lot of things done around the house. I was able to focus more time prayer time.  I had been going to daily Mass over the past year and have tried very hard not to miss.  It really is life changing to be able to receive Jesus every day.  Daily Mass is the center of my life.  During Pentecost, the church I am attending had 48 hours of Perpetual Adoration every Friday (starting at midnight) until the following Saturday. I had signed up for 5 a.m. every Friday morning.  I looked forward to this hour with Jesus.  There are no words to describe what goes on during this hour.  The outpouring of Love that I experienced from our Lord is beyond comprehension.   This is something that needs to be experienced to understand.   Well, one morning I am finishing up my hour in the chapel and am walking down the aisle to leave and I see our Priest sitting on the back row dressed in his robes before Mass.  He looks at me and says in his Irish brogue “Karen, what are you doing for the past week that you are not in your scrubs anymore?”  I told him I was kind of between jobs right now. He asked what it is that I do and I explained to him.  He then looks at me and says “Do you know Dr. M__?”  I told him no, I didn’t know him but had heard of him.  He said, “Sure you do, he’s in Mass every morning with you” I told him I still didn’t know who he was.  He then told me that the doctor had told him last night he was looking to hire a nurse  and asked if he could introduce me after Mass.  Well, he did and I went on an interview with his office manager that day and was hired that day.  So, if finding out about a job from your most loved priest in the back of the Adoration chapel in the presence of Jesus isn’t a sign that I needed to take this job then there wasn’t a job out there for me.  Again- GOD IS SO GOOD!  I love my job, I love my doctor.  I work with the nicest girls anyone could want to work with.  The patients are wonderful.  I know God wants me here.  I know I am not changing the world in a big way but I hope I am at least changing my part of the world.  Apparently this is where God wants me and I am happy.